When Perfection's a Mistake
When Perfection is a Mistake
Redefine it. Reclaim energy.
If you have been a subscriber for a while (or even 2 weeks) you know without a doubt that I’m human. I’m absolutely not error-free. Though I wish at times I didn’t have public “Oops” moments, it is just part of putting myself and passions out there...I’m bound to flub up now and then.
As I write this I realize the problem is not necessarily the idea of perfection, rather how we define it.
One definition of perfection is: “the state of being entirely without any flaws, defects, or shortcomings.”
This kind of perfection is a dangerous game. It’s a trap and an energy sucker. Bottom line line--using this definition as a gauge for human beings, is a mistake...
This kind of perfection is what causes us to race around the house before company arrives in effort to eliminate dust bunnies or stacks, or dirty dishes. It’s what prompts us to spend an extra hour (or five) on a project that could be forever fine-tuned. It creates the anxiety that someone is going to point out some huge evidential flaw that we’re a fraud, causing us to constantly "prove" ourselves. What an exhausting way to live!
Growing up I had a friend whose parents were very particular and strict. I remember a sense of tension and excess order in the house --everyone had impeccable behavior, nothing was out of place, A’s were the acceptable grade, you never disagreed. There was this silent sense of pressure and intensity, where making a mistake wasn’t an option I wanted to explore. Zero fun.
There is a time and place for everything. We have moments of insight, of greatness, of brilliance. We also have moments of flailing, disorder and oversight. All are essential to the human experience. In the balance of life, we couldn’t have one without the other. It’s not natural.
A Different Definition
Here is a definition of perfection that I relish: “the state of being whole and complete in its nature.”
What I love about this definition is that we are born this way. We are born whole and complete, we aren’t missing anything. There’s nothing we “should” be doing differently. We are infants for goodness sake!
It isn’t until later in life that we begin to feel a sense of judgment about one or more areas of life. We realize that we are great at some things and simply OK at other things. We realize that one day we succeed and another we don’t. In those moments we make monumental decisions…we either decide its acceptable or unacceptable-- to be OK, to fail, to be anything less than flawless.
(Psst! What’s radically refreshing about decisions? You can make new ones any time you want!)
As I stretch and grow toward the best version of me, I accept an intrinsic amount of “failure.”(That’s all part of pushing edges, taking risks and evolving!) And I’m totally okay with it. Why? I’ve decided I’m more committed to living a powerful, fully expressed life than I am to being flawless. I’m more committed to the belief that we are whole and complete in our nature, and therefore already perfect. This definition works for me, and gives me great latitude on my often messy adventure of growing into my best version of myself. Wanna join in?
About Robin:
Robin Peglow Berg of http://www.soulmoxie.net/ is a Life Fulfillment Strategist --a consultant, coach and speaker devoted to guiding others to have the courage to live a fulfilling life with soul.
She shows highly driven, successful women entrepreneurs and biz leaders how to create a new model for success that is energizing, deeply meaningful and helps them to thrive no matter what. She applies 10 years of coaching, consulting and speaking to craft strategic programs for long term success.
In : Motivation
Tags: "soul moxie" "robin peglow berg" "life coach" "life coaching" fulfillment priorities freedom "perfection" "personal development"
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